~* NO REASON AT ALL *~

This post is completely unrelated to my baby-free life.

I am currently involved in kickstarting my passion project- a nonprofit organization called Hope For Heroes. We will be providing a fully-equipped functional fitness and resource facility for veterans and their families, specifically to help during the transition from military to civilian life, when they may feel abandoned or hopeless. We will be staffed with knowledgeable trainers, physical therapists, and nutritionists educated and experienced in working with the disabled. We will also provide help with housing assistance, education assistance, TriCare and VA navigation, interviewing and resume' skills, marriage and addiction counseling, and so much more. Please take a few moments to check out our fundraising site. If you can't spend, please SHARE!! The sooner we get funded, the sooner we can start helping those who have sacrificed to help us!!

http://www.gofundme.com/70j8w0

~* Reason #15: Valentine's Day *~

Yes, I probably can (and might) do this for every "holiday".  So, what's my problem with Valentine's Day? Well, I have a few, but I'm keeping this directed at the kids.

I grew up knowing that on Valentine's Day, I'd wake up with a small, heart-shaped box of chocolate and a small stuffed animal waiting on the kitchen table for me, from my mom. I loved that, I really did. I'd go to school, and everyone would decorate a brown paper bag to collect Valentine's cards in. Sometimes they had little candy hearts or lollipops or boxes of Nerds attached, and it was awesome. Until kids weren't so awesome anymore.

Let's face it, the older kids get, the meaner they get. Around 6th or 7th grade, there are more than a couple of asshole kids in every class. They'll either skip the Valentine thing all together, or worse, write really mean things to other kids. Then you hit high school, and nobody gets anything unless someone thinks you're special. This concept, I'm actually ok with because it's pretty much how real life goes.

I'm not a fan of setting kids up for failure. If you let them think that everyone thinks they're special from the beginning, they get crushed when they realize they aren't. And on the flip side, you let them grow up thinking they need to be people pleasers- picking the coolest, trendiest Valentine cards with the best candy and making sure everyone gets one. Definitely not a fan.

I know someone is thinking that I'm digging pretty deep here, and they're probably the ones who still feel like every kid needs to get a card.

~* Reason #14: Snow Days *~

This isn't something I really ever thought about growing up in the North. Snow was just an expected thing, anytime from Thanksgiving to Easter. But here in the South....life is different. It snowed last night, maybe about 4 inches, and the entire town is pretty much shut down. Fort Bragg- yeah, the military post- is SHUT DOWN. It's crazy. But, it got me thinking- What about people with kids??

Some people do have to work today. What about the ones that have kids? How do you find a last minute baby-sitter willing to drive on the mostly-unplowed roads to come watch your kid for a bit? And what if you can't really afford one, but can't afford to take the day off from work? Headaches I'm happy without.

Then, of course, there are parents who stay home so it's not as big of a deal for them. But I HATE snow. And ice. And cold weather. Kids love that shit. Kids who usually sleep til noon will be up at the crack of dawn to go play in the snow. And as a responsible parent, you should probably be out there with them, showing them how to build a snowman or throw a snowball. FUCK THAT. I would be the most miserable parent on earth, stuck outside in the damn snow just so my kid could play in it for a while. There is nothing in this world I hate more than being cold. Ugh.

So, today, I'm grateful to be childless because it means I can hang out with my Netflix, inside, with a nice hot cup of coffee instead of freezing my nips off playing outside in this crap.

~* Reason #13: Wanderlust *~

I know this kind of falls under the road-trip subject, but not really. I'm talking more about moving, less about vacations. Lately, I've been contemplating my options for the future. I have 4 1/2 months left on my employment contract, and the lease on my apartment is easy to get out of. I've been wondering what to do if my investors don't come through for me, which is looking more and more like a probability. I have endless options. The only thing limiting me is, as always, finances. But, I have no other ties. Nothing else holding me down. Nobody else to be responsible for. I've been thinking I might move to the beach. You know when you're trying to make a decision, and you're playing out all the options, and then you hit the right answer and your whole body feels lighter? That's what happened when I stumbled across that thought.

I tend to make my decisions based on the people in my life. But right now, there is nobody else in my life. Including family. Hell, my mom couldn't even bother to tell me she got married again, so nobody else gets a say in where I go or what I do anymore. I had stumbled across a quote the other day that lit up in my head when I thought about moving to the beach- "Instead of always planning your next vacation, you should focus on creating a life you don't need to escape from." How perfect is that?

I know it's all up in the air, and I still have a few months to figure out what I'm actually going to do. But my point is, I don't have to think about how my decision will affect anyone else. I don't have to worry about packing for another person, finding a new school or baby sitter, tearing them away from their friends, trying to explain the WHY of moving (because your mom just wants to, kid). I know it sounds selfish, but it's really a relief to not concern myself with anyone else.

~* Reason #12: Road Trips *~

I enjoy road trips, on the rare occasion that I have enough "extra" money to just fill the tank and go somewhere. It takes about 6 hours to get back to Baltimore, and it's all highway driving. Something about it just relaxes me. When I make this trip, I usually plan 2 stops- about 2 hours apart. I learned this lesson after the first time I made that drive alone- I hadn't wanted to stop, so I just kept driving. By the time I made it home, I was sick. Wobbly, nauseous, dehydrated. Miserable. So now, I stop about 2 hours in to pee, then again halfway through VA for gas, and if needed, I'll stop again to pee. I blast the music the whole ride. I speed- I can't help it, my right foot is made of lead. I'll eat in the car. I have plenty of bottled water. It's therapy.

Now, add to that relaxing scenario at least one kid. Age is irrelevant. Before I even start typing the list, I'm getting tense.

I'd have to pack for the kid. Clothes and food and stuff to keep it "occupied" during the trip (as if any kid anywhere has ever been occupied on a road trip). I'd have to censor my music. I'd probably be more cautious of speeding (yes, I know that's not necessarily a bad thing). I'd have to stop at least twice as often to feed it, or let it pee, or change it. I'd have to talk to another human being. I'd have to unpack it, then pack it back up every time we stopped somewhere. I might even have to deal with carsickness. Ugh.  Then, I'd have to do it all again on the return trip! Nothing about that seems remotely fun to me.

~* Reason #11: Christmas *~

I wasn't gonna do it, but I feel obligated. Christmas is a huge reason I'm glad I don't have kids. 

Christmas with kids is expensive. This year, I didn't have a single person to go shopping for. I sent a friend of mine some gourmet chocolate bars, and I made some chocolate bark for another, but I didn't have to. I couldn't have done that with kids. And kids these days are so damned expectant- they aren't hoping and wishing for gifts, they actually expect to see a freakin' PS4 or an iPod or a tablet or whatever. Who has that kind of money?? Well, obviously the parents buying this kind of thing, but I don't. 

Then, there's also the baby-sitter. Kids are off for 2 weeks from school. Parents aren't usually off for the same two weeks. Actually, in this town, a lot of them are military so they get holiday leave, but in general... Plus, even if I had the time off, I'm not sure I could stand to be cooped up in a house full of kids for two weeks non-stop.

There's also all the other stuff- Christmas baking, Christmas pageants, Christmas music, Christmas presents for the kids' friends and their families, deciding who goes where for Christmas. Yeesh. 

I guess the bottom line on this one is that I am well aware of the fact that I am not properly equipped to suitably provide an enjoyable Christmas for a child, and so, I am glad I don't have to.

~* Reason #10: Santa Claus *~

Yep, Santa Claus.

Don't misunderstand, I love Christmas and all things Christmas-related. But I don't want to have to try to explain to a kid for about 7 or 8 years that some fluffy dude with a beard and a red suit drops off toys to every kid in the world on one night out of the year, and then have to tell them that I lied to them for 7 or 8 years.

Lying aside, there's the explanations. Why Santa is a movie star. Why Santa is at the mall. How Santa can be at all of the malls. How Santa fits down the chimney. How Santa makes it to all of the houses in one night. How Santa gets into homes without chimneys. How Santa makes reindeer fly. How Santa can eat all those cookies without getting sick. And the list goes on.

Well, at least the Salvation Army stopped using people dressed up as Santa. One less question to answer- why Santa is begging in front of WalMart like a homeless person.